Resilience – Page 3 – Happy Schools

What Are You Grateful For?

November 30, 2023

I recently asked my doctor how I was going after he had run a series of blood tests on me. He said, “Ken, if I was you, I would be grateful for every day I am alive.” There’s an endorsement if ever there was one. He was joking, of course. But, surely that is good advice for all of us. I think that too many of us spend too much of our time focusing on what is wrong in our lives and what could go wrong in the future. Though let me be quick to say that if you are presently dealing with very tough life circumstances, it can often be very hard to find anything to be grateful for.…

How to End Self-Critical Thoughts (Part 2)

November 23, 2023

Stevef

Resilience

In part 1 last week, we recognised that at times we can be our own harshest critic. Our expectations can be unrealistic and we can take it to heart when things don’t work out as we had planned. In responding to these self-critical thoughts we looked at the first two steps of the 4 N process. NOTICE the Thought – dump what is going on in your brain onto paper. NORMALIZE the Thought – negative thoughts are normal in the human brain. NEUTRALIZE the Thought Neutralizing is where we’re trying to just get to the facts of the situation. We are taking the punch or power out of the circumstance. It helps by removing the adjectives and adverbs. For example,…

How to End Self-Critical Thoughts (Part 1)

November 16, 2023

Stevef

Resilience

At times we can be our own harshest critic. That little voice inside our head can be very self-critical. This can be because our work in schools can seem never ending. There is always more that can be done. More planning, more preparation, more consultation, more factors to consider and more meetings to be held. Despite our best efforts, sometimes things don’t quite work out the way we might like and often that leads to further self-critical thoughts. We can mentally beat ourselves up about what we “should have done!” Often this is unrealistic and not helpful. Hindsight is such a wonderful thing. Thoughts are important because they drive our actions, our choices, our results and ultimately our happiness. The…

Finding Your Happy Self Again

November 2, 2023

Stevef

Resilience

At some point everyone experiences days which feel like they’ve got black clouds overhead and the outlook is gloomy. On those days it can feel like you’ll never be happy again, that there’s no hope and solutions seem far, far away. Most people are acutely aware of how much attitude can affect how we behave and experience our world. If we go into a lesson (or a meeting) feeling grumpy, chances are we will have unpleasant experiences, people will seem really irritating and things just ‘go wrong’. Attitude is huge and contagious. It’s vital to have some strategies up your sleeve for when the doldrums descend, so that you can climb your way out. Teach and model these skills to…

Take the Initiative This World Teachers’ Day

October 26, 2023

Stevef

Resilience

Working in schools can be tough and demanding. Much of the work that staff in schools do, goes unrecognised. It can take years before we see the impact that we have had. The lack of respect for the work of staff in schools and the impact they have, has contributed to increased staff turnover and made recruitment more difficult than ever. As a result, staff shortages are common and attracting people to join the profession is challenging. However, our work is very important and can also be very rewarding. We have the opportunity to change people’s lives every single day. If we only focus on the problems and challenges of our profession and can’t find and talk about the positive…

Increase Contentment By Avoiding Comparison

October 19, 2023

Stevef

Resilience

One of the greatest protective factors against unhappiness and a low mood is social connection. Quality friendships, ones that allow you to just be who you are without judgement, decrease stress and anxiety and they build self-worth and belonging. However, something is harming quality connection and it’s becoming a cultural epidemic… comparison and competition. Understanding the following definitions can be helpful in recognizing our behaviour. Comparison – the consideration or estimate of the similarities or dissimilarities between two things or people. Competition – the activity or condition of striving to gain or win something by defeating or establishing superiority over others. Comparison and competition lowers self-esteem in the ‘losers’ because they feel ‘less than’ and ‘not enough’. For the ‘winners’,…

Letting off Steam the Safe Way

October 12, 2023

Stevef

Resilience

Anger gets a bad rap and sure enough, can cause a lot of damage if it’s not contained or used in a healthy way, but it is a normal and helpful emotion when used appropriately. Anger has a very definite purpose or else we wouldn’t experience it. Anger can be very informative and knowing how to work with it effectively is an essential life skill. When you embrace anger and learn from it, you’ll find yourself feeling empowered, setting healthy boundaries and building respect. Anger is a protective mechanism. It occurs when one of a few things happen: basic boundaries are violated and you’re under threat, feelings are being frequently suppressed instead of expressed, a need is not being met…

Celebrate the Wins at Work

October 5, 2023

Stevef

Activities

I don’t think we focus on the positives nearly enough. This is true in our personal lives, but also in workplaces, where around two-thirds of people say they do not feel their efforts and achievements are acknowledged or valued. To put it another way, there is not enough celebration of the wins. Celebrating the wins at work has several benefits: It makes you and others feel good: When we focus on making other people feel good by celebrating their wins, everyone wins. We get the feel-goods as well. It is also important to remember, we can celebrate people’s wins in their personal lives as well. It shows progress towards important goals: Yes, the big wins can be celebrated but even…

Change Your Reality

August 31, 2023

Stevef

Resilience

Life is really not about reality. It’s about our perception of what is happening around us and to us; what we say to ourselves about it; how we view it or feel about it. That’s the beauty of the human brain – we have choices. We have options in terms of how we behave, respond, think or change in the face of the stresses in our lives. Most of us are lacking in energy and vitality, feeling overwhelmed, constantly exhausted, and having massive sense of humour failures! It’s called ‘Burn Out.’ We all know, the best way to avoid the big B.O., is to have a balanced lifestyle – exercise regularly, eat well, sleep at least seven hours a day,…

STOP – Make Rules That Help Your Well-Being

August 24, 2023

Stevef

Resilience

The default move for getting more done is to do more. That can work and it can also waste a lot of time, energy and attention doing stuff that just doesn’t really matter. We also need to know when to stop doing things. This week, create some stopping rules so you’ll know when to stop doing something. Here are 8 situations you might like to consider setting some rules that you should abide by. Inspired by Donald Sull and Kathleen Eisenhardt’s book, Simple Rules. Email – When have you spent enough time on email? If you are checking school email at night, set a time limit. You’ll be amazed at how much gets done in 15 minutes if we set…